One More Heart Procedure

It seems as though I have one more heart procedure to go through before this long journey can (possibly) come to an end. As I mentioned after I had my heart catheter done, I have some extra veins branching off a main artery in my heart that may possibly be causing the chest pain I have been experiencing over the last four years. The only way to fix that is to do another catheter and to insert little coils into these veins to cap them off.

I had the consult with the specialist yesterday. He spoke to my husband and me very candidly and while he wants to be optimistic, he also wants us to be realistic and know that this may not work. All he can do is perform the surgery and hope for the best. Yes, this can be the reason for the discomfort. Yes, it could work. Yes, I could feel better very soon. But I also need to be aware that it may do nothing at all to alleviate the pain and shortness of breath.

And then we would be back to square one. And I would be devastated.

Thinking realistically, I thought, I have nothing to lose. It took me two years to find a doctor to even listen to me and believe me in the first place when I complained about chest pain and shortness of breath. It took another two years to find what was even a possible culprit. I feel satisfied with the answers I have been given as to my "condition" because of the pain I felt when my doctor was tinkering around inside of my heart during the heart cath, particularly when he got to the spot we are currently discussing. Furthermore, I have no better answers or options given to me. None of the medications have worked. And while I certainly don't want to go through this again, I see no better way towards a more productive life.

I don't know if you're the praying type or the good vibes type, but if you find yourself with nothing better to do on Wednesday, I good use some good juju. I'm nervous and scared and hopeful, but I'm finding it hard to be optimistic after being let down so many times. Not to mention that apparently, once again, I have the privilege of having something rare wrong with me so nobody seems to know much about what the outcome is going to be. Yea me.